64 questions to get to know a person better

It is not worth being typical. When we want to discover another person, we must use original questions. The psychologists have lots of tools to better understand the behavioral style of the person or personality type.

However, that does not mean that people outside the study of psychology can not have other ways of getting to know the people around them better. In fact, there is a relatively affordable option to get to know more about the people around us. These are the questions to meet a person.

Questions to meet someone

And it is that an open dialogue between two people can serve a large number of objectives and functions: deception, cooperation, the disclosure of concrete data and, of course, it can also be a context in which we come into contact with the personality of our interlocutor and we create our own hypotheses about him .

Therefore, I propose 64 questions to get to know someone better and that you can use to create an environment of trust in a short time.

Some questions to get to know a person better

We may use these questions to stick to the scrupulousness and exhaustiveness of a psychologist practicing as such, but in addition to seeing how the other person reacts to certain phrases and questions, it will also help us add a plus of interest to our conversations and, in In many cases, we will make the other person open up and more open to us.

It is a list that could be extended to infinity, since the questions to know someone better can be as diverse as the human imagination is wide. Here I recommend a few, but of course it is not necessary to use all of them, since you would err on the side of turning the dialogue into an interrogation. 

You can use the ones you choose in the order you want, although it is recommended to leave the most personal ones for last. In any case, I recommend that you enjoy the process of getting to know the other person.

1. Where would you like to live?

Posing this simple topic is a good way to know the tastes and priorities of people. You can modify this question to make it more specific ("In which country would you like to live, in what city, etc.") and thus see some aspects of life that your interlocutor or interlocutor values ​​the most and some situations that he cannot bear.

2. Where would your perfect vacation take place?

Combining this question with the previous one, you can see if there are contrasts between the aspects of the ideal environment in which to live and the characteristics that a place in which one is only punctual should have, in passing. Knowing someone better involves not only knowing what that person asks of the routine, but also how they like to break it.

3. Can you describe your bedroom to me?

The bedroom is one of the most private rooms in the home and one that spends the most hours . Therefore, it usually reflects many aspects of people's tastes and personality. For example, you can get an idea about whether they value their privacy more or less according to the barriers that exist between the interior of the bedroom and common places, or you can know the preferences and hobbies according to the decoration and objects that populate the space.

4. Which historical person would you like to interview?

This question is useful to better understand the person's philosophical concerns, interests, and even cultural background.

5. What type of clothing would you not wear under any circumstances?

This question serves, among other things, to test the other person's inventiveness and creativity, since the possible answers are practically infinite. In addition, it is a question that is both challenging and light-hearted, which adds interest to the conversation and serves to relieve tension.

6. What are your three favorite music bands?

There are some studies that indicate that musical tastes are important in the creation of groups of friends, especially the younger their members are. 

This question serves to get to know the other person better and to know about their preferences in a subject that is difficult to deal with from rationality and solid arguments. 

On the other hand, it is more difficult to answer than "What kind of music do you listen to?", So that you will make more sure that the other person is aware of the dialogue.

7. What is freedom for you?

Through this question you will see the other person's ability to deal with abstract subjects, not so connected with day to day. On the other hand, if you have difficulty answering it or seem surprised by this question, this person may not be used to touching on philosophical issues closely .

8. What is the aspect about you that you like the most?

The possible answers to this question are as diverse as the type of information about the other person that you can get with him is varied. It is a way of glimpsing how the interlocutor values ​​himself, if he pays more or less attention to his physical or psychological attributes and, incidentally, you can know first-hand aspects that you did not know about his way of being or his mental capacities.

9. What is your favorite book?

Another question to get an idea about the cultural background of the neighbor and, incidentally, to know his literary tastes , something that never hurts. You will also know if he is used to reading more or less regularly.

10. Do you often think about what is happening to you and what you feel?

Raising this issue know if this person spend more or less time to manage their emotions and to distance themselves from what happens to analyze it coldly. Having this habit is usually associated with less impulsiveness and the habit of thinking about the consequences of things before doing them.

11. What super power would you have?

Another light-hearted question to ease tensions and create a relaxed atmosphere between so many questions and, in addition, to exercise a little  creativity .

12. What four series are your favorites?

This is another one of those questions to get to know someone better through the type of cultural products they consume. The answer to this question in itself is not the interesting thing, but the aspects of these series that the person claims to value the most, as well as the characters in which he seems to feel most identified and the reasons for it.

13. What three things do you appreciate most in a person?

It is best not to start by asking this question, as it is quite personal. It can help you to know the values ​​that the interlocutor appreciates the most .

14. How would you like to be in the future?

This is one of those questions to get to know someone better that will help you to know about the aspirations of this person, as well as some aspects of their  self-concept.

15. If you were an animal, what would you be?

Another question to know about the self-image of your interlocutor, the own characteristics that he considers most relevant and those that are not so relevant.

16. What song would serve to summarize your personality? Why?

The essence of a person summed up with a musical piece. A difficult task, but not impossible, and it can serve to express certain qualities and aspects of itself through music, something that can hardly be covered with conceptual categories.

17. What four adjectives best describe you?

Like other questions that have already come out, this one serves to get an idea of ​​how the other person sees herself and, incidentally, to know the own characteristics that she considers most relevant or unusual.

18. What is the state of mind that you like least?

This simple question can be used to know certain hobbies, concerns or situations that the other person usually tries to avoid. Very useful since, instead of talking about specific situations, we talk about the states of mind that they trigger, subjective states of consciousness that can occur in very diverse contexts.

19. How would your friends describe you?

If other questions would be to know how this person sees himself, this is to know how he thinks they see him. Asking about your friends can make your responses skewed towards the positive, but in return you reinforce the environment of trust.

20. What three types of trade would you like to practice?

With this question you can learn a little more about the type of efforts and challenges towards which the likes of the other person are oriented. In the same way, it can be used to get an idea about whether you are better at tasks governed by fixed behavior patterns or those that leave more room for creativity, or those that involve teamwork or solitary work.

21. What skill would you like to hone in order to become fully proficient?

It serves to know more about the tastes of this person and, on the other hand, the type of challenges and projects that he would like to undertake.

22. If you could only keep five phone numbers of people outside your family, what would they be?

It is an indirect way of knowing more about the circle closest to this person . It can be used to find out if you keep relatively old friends or tend to lose touch with people and constantly create new friends.

23. What kind of person would you be afraid of?

Nothing like this question to know the type of attitudes and personalities that your interlocutor tends to avoid in the people with whom he interacts.

24. What is the craziest thing you've ever done?

A classic, but no less useful for that. It serves to know to what extent the limits that frame the correct behavior are more or less present in the person who talks to you.

25. What would be a good title for your autobiography?

Of course, the interesting thing about asking this question is not the title that occurs to the interlocutor, but the conversation that arises from the answer. From this very simple topic, a conversation can be started in which we get to know the other person better based on the way in which he explains his vision about his own life, the milestones that marked him in the past, etc.

26. What do most people think of you and isn't it?

This is one of the best questions to get to know a person, because it gives rise to the interlocutor or interlocutor talking about their characteristics that they consider to be more unknown and to give examples that help to understand their point of view .

27. What would you have liked to start learning 5 years ago?

This question serves to get an idea about the life projects that the other person values ​​in the present. At the same time, it helps to understand what the same person's priorities and objectives were in the past.

28. What kinds of people do you find especially attractive?

If we clarify this question by clarifying that we are not referring to something related to physical attraction, we will be able to recreate an approximate image of the personal characteristics that are most valued.

29. What characteristics do you like that are present in other people but not in you?

There is a difference between the ideal to which a person aspires and the characteristics that are highly valued in other people. This is a question to get to know the person exploring exactly this difference.

30. What topic would you like to be asked about to get to know you better?

Self-image and self- esteem come out once again, as in other questions to get to know someone better. Most likely, your interlocutor brings up topics that he understands that enhance the positive aspects of his person .

31. What kind of music do you like to dance?

The type of dance that a person likes the most can give us an idea of ​​their degree of introversion or extraversion. People who have a weakness for types of dance that are performed as a couple or in a group will have a greater propensity to be extraverted, while introverts will either hesitate when asked (not being accustomed to dancing) or respond to unrelated musical genres. with very complex ways of dancing, such as rock.

32. If you saw a dog whose paw was caught in a fence, what would you do? What if instead of a dog it was a lizard?

This double question serves to know the attitude of this person towards animals, whether they are domestic or not. The part in which the lizard is named makes this one of the best questions to get to know someone regarding their attachment links to ways of life very different from human.

33. In what situations would you be willing or willing to lie?

A question to test the degree of honesty that is habitual in the person with whom we are talking. Although anyone will try to give a better image of themselves than the one that corresponds to reality, the answers to this question allow us to compare people.

34. What are you most irrational afraid of?

With this question you can explore the other person's obsessions and fears . It is interesting to stop to think if the answer or the answers it gives has to do with material things, such as a type of animal or a specific situation, or with more abstract and general phenomena, such as misunderstanding, abuse of new technologies or existential voids.

35. In what way do you prefer to relate to people?

This is a very open-ended question that allows you to explore the situations in which the interlocutor or interlocutor prefers to interact with others: in group or two-person meetings, on the Internet, etc.

36. How would you define your type of sense of humor?

Humor is one of the most important characteristics of the human being, but it is not always expressed in the same way. There is black humor, absurd humor, slapstick ... different ways to experience laughter. A question to meet someone through their sense of humor (or lack of it).

37. Where would you go to relax for a few days?

This question is used to know the idea of ​​calm that the person who talks to us has.

38. And ... Where would you go for an adventure?

The opposite question to the previous one, to know what kind of exciting experiences attract the attention of the interlocutor or interlocutor.

39. What is the memory of your childhood that you have more alive?

This question does not have to give us particularly valuable information about the personality of the person who spoke with us (unless he is talking about a traumatic experience), but it can serve to create a relaxed atmosphere in which to ask more questions and, incidentally, to learn about the environment in which he was educated.

40. When did you realize that you had entered adulthood?

A way of knowing the conception of child and adult that the other person has. Are you child-minded or have you matured more than would be advisable?

41. What do you miss most about your childhood?

Another question to know the most childish and innocent side of the other person (if they have one).

42. What kind of people are the ones that you feel the most sorry for?

A way to explore the limits of the empathy of those who talk to us, although we must know how to recognize when a sincere answer is being given and when it is answered in an ironic way so as not to have to reveal this type of information.

43. With what kind of people would you be ashamed to be seen?

A question to know the image that someone wants to give of themselves, beyond the way in which they see themselves. It helps to know how far there is vanity in it.

44. Which 3 people inspire you the most?

This question not only allows you to know someone's concerns and sensibilities, but also their historical knowledge, which never hurts.

45. Do you consider yourself a superstitious person?

Knowing someone is also knowing things about their way of thinking, and believing in paranormal phenomena is something that talks about the way one conceives of reality and thinks about the way nature works.

46. ​​Do you prefer short and simple stories or convoluted and complex arguments?

You can always answer that both, but somehow it helps to know the type of stories and narratives that most attract someone's attention.

47. Do you like to know what is happening in distant places, or are you only interested in the local?

A way to probe the other person's concerns and cravings for information. Maybe we can learn more about his worldview.

48. Which fictional character do you identify with the most?

A way to leave open the possibility for the interlocutor or interlocutor to talk about their personality and their knowledge of works of fiction.

49. From which members of your family have you learned the most?

One of those questions to meet someone in your family context and, incidentally, their knowledge, skills and abilities.

50. Which member of your family is a greater example for you?

A similar question to the previous one, although in this case we are talking about a different facet of education: the role model that is followed.

51. Are you clear about what you are looking for in life?

To know the degree of structuring of the other person's life.

52. What kind of people would you never get along with?

Sometimes there are activities or forms of personality that cause significant rejection.

53. What kind of person would you refuse to talk to?

To know how far the limits of identification and empathy go.

54. How long has it been since something you deeply regret happened?

This question of the occasion to talk about regrets and mismanagement of situations.

55. Would it make you feel bad to leave taking many secrets with you?

This is one of the questions to meet a person that focus on an existential aspect.

56. Do you think you are a person open to change?

To know the degree of appreciation that the person feels for the routine and the familiar.

57. Do you feel threatened or threatened easily?

There are those who at least feel attacked or questioned.

58. Do you think that reputation is something important to you?

A way to know if you care a lot about the image it gives.

59. Is it better to defend causes for their legitimacy, or for the possibility of putting them into practice?

In this case, we explore the tendency towards idealism that our interlocutor has.

60. Is it hard for you to talk about yourself?

This question serves to know to what extent the other person is on the defensive.

61. What has been the pet you have loved the most?

Pets connect us with our inner child.

62. When did you spend the most money on something totally expendable?

We have all been the subject of a time when we have spent funds without pressing need.

63. If you did not work in what you currently work, what would you have liked to do?

To discover secret passions of your friends.

64. What is the first memory you have in your life?

It is difficult to remember events that happened before the age of 5-6, but remembering it is likely that you will rescue some special moment from your childhood.